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| ZXWWF's 2nd logo, consisting of my favorite three colors. |
CHAPTER TWO -- DETERMINATION
To give you guys an idea of the insanity it takes to run an e-fed, I will break down my average day from college at the time. I was commuting to and from college at the time, so the average day of college would have me wake up at roughly 8-9AM (depending on my class schedule for that day), an hour drive to college, work study job for a few hours prior to class, then more hours after class. Then those 'awesome' screening showings for my film studies courses at the time in the evenings and I wouldn't get out of class until roughly 10PM. I didn't have internet access at home at the time, so I would crash in the library until 12-1AM doing homework. If I was writing results for the e-fed, I wouldn't leave until sometimes 2-3AM. Then factor in that fateful drive back home I wouldn't get back home and into bed until about 4AM, only to wake right back up and do this all over again. My weekends consisted of mostly getting homework done for my courses while managing my WWE Smackdown vs. Raw saves - I had roughly 4 memory cards that are full of CAWs used for my e-fed. I still have these saves (SvR06 and Fire Pro Wrestling Returns) to this day for those interested. Tweaking, adjusting, and managing/creating CAWs from references on roughly 50 to sometimes 200 pages of printed material, some of those formulas were hand-written when I didn't have the means to print them out. Yeah, I know -- I'm insane. Now tell me something I don't know.
To my fellow fed-heads, I REALLY don't hope your workloads are as hectic as mine at the time, but that's the price I paid as I didn't allow my education to waiver at the cost of my hobbies.
Lesson 6: The hard truth about big nWo style stables in e-feds is that they really don't work.
Enter The High Rollers, handled by Lina (handling Ashley Massaro) and her now, ex-boyfriend/fiancee, Jiancy (handling their leader Chris Jericho) spear-headed this group, mostly consisting of their friends handling various members - ranging from LAX (Homicide, Hernandez, and Konnan) who were really popular in TNA at the time, Ivory (well before Samuel starting handling her -- more on him in a later chapter), Edge, Christy Hemme, Mr. Kennedy, Molly Holly, Abyss, and more.
I'm sure you're reading that and thinking the same thing I did at the time, "How the HELL does Chris Jericho end up working with all of those guys? Let alone LEADING this band of misfits?" At the time, I was pretty shy about crushing people's dreams and telling them the ideas they have are completely stupid - well, I am still kinda shy about that, but I try to let people down easy nowadays, instead of allowing them to make complete fools of themselves and my e-federation as a whole for even airing this crap. Take it from me, fed-heads, but when one of your members comes to you with an idea this stupid, shut them down kindly. You don't have to insult their intelligence but at least suggest something else or offer ways to improve it rather than shooting it down completely. People have feelings too and you wouldn't want people to openly tell you that your ideas are stupid.
I know I have had a wealth of stupid ideas, but my friends were there to steer me in the right track -- most of the time. I know, I know, the "Caucasian Bulldozer" gimmick was silly but it was hilarious to me, dammit. "The Caucasian Bulldozer" AKA Hugo was one of my original filler CAWs, but was the equivalent to Umaga. The only difference here was he just a fat guy wearing a diaper and a mask, because he was essentially a mental case. One of my jobber CAWs was using him as a bodyguard as the fat guy flips out at the sight and sound of a candy bar being snapped. Sound familiar, right? It should. It's pretty much the poor man's version of Armado's control over Umaga.
While we're on the subject of stupid ideas, I have to tell this story about an individual known as "Wild Thing" James Bowen. I have seen him appear in other feds after this event, so best of luck to him in his future endeavors, but sorry dude, I have to tell this tale as it's part of my e-fed's history:
James Bowen came into the federation with a '80's rockstar gimmick with a hint of Shawn Michaels/Chris Jericho vibe to him. Sounds cool on paper right? Like most members in the fed during this time, he quickly became 'corrupted' by the roleplaying boards. I remember taking the weekend off to study for midterms and I come back from the weekend and find out this fool has literally KILLED himself on the roleplay boards. My inbox is full of PMs about the situation and most of the people involved started deleting their posts after I started asking questions. James Bowen's idea was to die then somehow magically come back from the dead on the next show. He sent me the entire concept via PM stating that's why he killed himself off and deleted his account, explaining that he was planning on starting over as a new zombie-like gimmick coming back from the grave. He was expecting since he was freed from the bounds of normal members and now in his eyes, he was qualified to become a staff member. By now, I was telling him hell no a hundred times. This Anne Rice novel BS wasn't going to happen in my fed. I have to give him credit though, that was the most original attempt to campaign yourself as a staff member that I have EVER seen.
Mind you this wasn't the first time someone deleted their accounts. Sheena Marie did it after getting upset, as she always had an issue controlling her temper. I didn't allow her to come back and I didn't allow this individual to come back either. That's up there with Litablaze's sidekick who morphed into a werewolf at night that the Rebels were trying to bring in before they got axed.
Go ahead and enjoy that laugh before we go back on topic...
At this time, ZXWWF had a LOT of stables, alliances, and tag teams so it kept things interesting for the most part. We had Blonde Ambition ("Supergirl" Talia Summers and "The Lovely" Lacey, accompanied by "The Radiant" Rain -- they would later evolve into the Minnesota Homewrecking Crew), Angelic Insanity (Justice and Kirsten's older sister, "The Glitter Angel" Nicole), LAX, Vicious & Delicious (Jonathan Magnum and a homosexual Jeff Jarrett, accompanied by Terri Runnels), Team OMEGA (Jeff Hardy and Shannon Moore), The Dominators (Shelton Benjamin and Bobby Lashley), and my personal favorite, the X-Terminators (ZX, The Big Show, and Robert Roode w/ Ms. Brooks) - shameless self-promotion there.
But the thing people don't understand in e-feds is that stables, especially large ones do not work, unless an administator or staff are behind them. How did the nWo garner so much success in WCW? Simple, their members consisted mainly of guys on creative staff. They had full control of their gimmick and what they could and could not do on the program. Same thing with D-Generation X in WWF during the Attitude Era days. So from the High Rollers' perspective I was "holding them back" whereas in reality I was merely showing them how running a stable prolly works out. Sadly, this would not be the only time I butt heads with these individuals.
Lesson 7: Just like real wrestling locker rooms, beware the formations of cliques and buddy systems. These groups of friends will do anything to get themselves over and don't worry about who they have to step on to get to the top of your federation.
2007 ushered in ZXWWF's 2nd Diva Search on Caws.ws and I attracted in quite a number of individuals this time, regardless of the fact that my e-fed was still using WWE Smackdown vs. Raw 2006 for simulating results than the newly released 2007 upgrade. Why was my e-fed simmed? Why did I still use 2006 over 2007? Easy answers to two easy questions that are common to me at the time. SvR2007 was a pile of shit outside of the milestone that it was the first WWE title on next-gen consoles. Its CAW mode was mediocre compared to the previous year's and the AI took several steps backwards to boot. I felt my members were allowed more creativity and originality on the previous game, so I didn't want to limit that in the slightest. That is one thing that I am more than thankful that the higher powers has sent me throughout my time of running this e-federation is the sheer amount of people overflowing with creativity over those who lacked the originality or drive to do anything.Choosing simulation over promo-based rules for my federation came as an easier choice at the time. Those of you reading this that are part of my GZWA federation know that we just recently made the transition into becoming a promo-based federation after so long. In that federation, I have more committed roleplayers. Back when I was running ZXWWF, it was a mix of part-time/amateur (read: new to the roleplaying game) handlers and those who were entirely either experienced roleplayers and/or strictly original CAW creators who just thrived from their creations in the mix with other characters and wrestlers. In ZXWWF's case, the simmed format worked best and set us apart from most other feds at the time. My personal hook, line and catcher for self-promoting the e-fed was to offer a much more laid back and less taxing and less formally anal outlet for wrestling fans. I'll admit that I fished and stole a few members from both Caws.ws and their own ICW e-fed off their forums. But in my defense, that was their own stupidity to set the standards so far up, yet only allow friends of a friend of a friend of a friend of the fed's inner circle into the federation. It still amazes me to this day to see them turn down one very talented roleplayer after another. If you want to talk about the inner workings of the corrupt officials of Caws.ws I suggest you go here. I'm not the guy who is well-versed on what goes on that site anymore as my browsing habits are down to sheer minimum now and I rarely post there.
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| Alpha_Omega's (Kasset Tsunami's creator) tribute to the Divas of ZXWWF at the end of 2007. Kudos to anyone who can name everyone in this photo. |
Much like Diva Search in the previous year, ZXWWF received a crop of fresh new faces as a result of the Diva Search, including a good friend of mine named Chuck Williams joining up. The most notable of these names was TriXie Callaway, handled by an user who will be rather popular in the duration of this story, going by the name of Mrscenabatista.
Both Sheena Marie and Damien Wilson offered entries into the contest this year, but by this point I had already banned them from my e-fed due to their behavior and/or misconduct. Weren't they my friends? Yes, but that doesn't stop me from doing my job as the administrator of the e-fed. Fed-heads, take note - there will be that moment (often times, multiple occasions) when you have to discipline your friends. It was a tough bullet to shallow, but it just comes with the territory. One of the many tough decisions a fed-head has to make as the head cheese. By the way, Sheena, I did like Madison Skye though. Too bad we had that falling out at the time.
Now for the duration of this chronicle, the star of this story will be Mrscenabatista - all of the good and bad that she brought to my e-federation. From here on out, I don't give a damn if you're her friend or her worst enemy. This is still my story and how things transpired through my eyes. With all of that out of the way, let's continue this tale shall we?
Mrscenabatista was a dear friend, but I honestly can't say as much nowadays if I'm being honest. Like real friends, we shared each others' secrets and bounced ideas and concepts off each other. She came to me for support about recovering from rehab and returning to a sense of normalcy in her real life. Don't quote me on what was her real problem, but she seemed a bit bi-polar to me at times. One day she's cool and happy, another she's borderline mental and annoyed at every little thing. Then there were times she told me some questionable stuff that I'm still not sure to this day that were true or not, like her dating Sheamus O'Shaunessy (currently known as Sheamus on the WWE roster) at one point then to her best friend, another handler by the name of Riddilynn, committing suicide -- I apologize if she's really gone, but even to this day I find it rather odd that she still shows up online on several of my spare AOL and Yahoo accounts even up to this day. I'm sure those of you reading this even think that sounds like a load of bullshit.
With that being said, that's another thing to take in here, fed-heads. You're going to have members tell you the truth, lies, and combinations of both. I'm naturally a nice person, but at that time, I was really naive to the nature of people over the Internet, as you really can't judge character as well as you can IRL. That person you think you're calling your friend isn't your friend at all and is only playing you to reap in the benefits of success in your e-federation. Looking back, I don't see the reason to try to play me for a fool. Mrscenabatista was a talented roleplayer (initially handling just Trish Stratus and Trixie Callaway before picking up Lalli Pop and Melina from Riddilynn) and she didn't need nor require my assistance in her success in my e-fed. She had a knack for making friends in my federation and blossoming a series of interesting and intriguing rivalries with other characters and their handlers.
While Mrscenabatista's popularity continued to rise, I gained a big brother of sorts from Chuck Williams. Chuck was one of those guys who makes you laugh from everything that comes out of his mouth and I still continue to chat with him regularly to this day. He would make me laugh at the absurd concepts behind some of the other members characters, especially Mrscenabatista's own Trixie Callaway, who was dubbed an adopted daughter of The Undertaker but raised by the late Eddie Guerrero, but still had time to hang out with the Hardy Boyz of Team Xtreme while she was growing up. Lost yet? Yeah, me too. Chuckles (what I call him as he HATES that name...LONG GI Joe-related story on why...) was older than me by a few years, so he enlightened me on the well-thought out histories to this own originals and their relationships. That's when I realized my own originals were flat in comparison and it was time for a creative overhaul. That was the first time in my e-fed career where I honestly took my characters seriously, rather than continuing to milk off their achievements in my private realm with my RL friends.
A common joke that ZXWWF veterans, namely Justice, brings up constantly even to this day to scare newbies is that if you get on my bad side, then you will find yourself jobbing to a sandwich - literally. Allow me to explain the origin of that joke as Chuck gets full credit for this one as my Psycho Sagus CAW wouldn't be such an epic jobber if it wasn't for his idea. The idea was that Psycho Sagus would come out to an impromptu match on the card, hoping to end his losing streak. His opponent? A sandwich. Yes, you read that correctly, a SANDWICH. So he lifts the sandwich and readies to bite into it and the condiments drop to the canvas, he slips on it and knocks himself out in the process. The sandwich lands on his chest and the referee has no choice but to make the count. Psycho Sagus lost to a sandwich and never lived that down in my e-federation. For those wondering, Sagus wasn't being handled by anyone and I NEVER repeated this act to anyone else, despite of the threats of doing it to someone who got on my bad side. Sagus was just one of my NPC filler CAWs to help get people over. I know for one thing, Chuckles and I had a hella good laugh at that one though.
Much like the other headaches in my federation, she became one of the pioneers on the Freeroam RP boards, frequently keeping things going on those boards, even though it was clearly pointed out to her and my othe rmembers that the roleplays and storylines done there did not count towards the match results. I'll admit I didn't really keep up with about 95% of went on that board and why it was so popular, especially when I was caught neck deep in my college coursework in undergrad while still running the federation. To me, it just seemed like mindless socializing that could have been done via IM or in a chat room rather than wasting time on the forum and neglecting their own actual storyline advancements.
Lesson 8: Choose your staff members wisely.
In a time where I was constantly looking for more help in terms of staff members to assist me with the ongoings of the e-federation, Mrscenabatista was highly recommended by her peers to become a staff member, joining the ranks with Mr. Black (Shawn Damian's handler) and Willo (Sunny/Sable/Chyna's handler) at the time. I named Amanda, Kirsten, and even Raven as staff members shortly afterwards as well. My thought process at the time was to name staff members who on more frequently as myself and would be able to monitor the on-goings of daily activity on the forum and to welcome newcomers as I was starting to feel like a telemarketer from how much I was selling (read: whoring out) my fed's name to this point. In my naive state of mind, I figured the staff role would give Mr. Black a spark of maturity and it was his last chance to turn his act around before he found himself out of my fed. Of course, we know he blew that chance since he always found himself in the gutter some way or another, either mentally or physically, by continuing to offend the female members. Why I waited so long to kick him out is still a mystery to me as I'm just going to chuck that onto the ongoing list of my stupid blunders over the duration of running this federation.One thing that all of my staff members don't know, is that I have a binder from everything that transpired in ZXWWF. That binder contains roughly 4 spiral-bound notebooks full with handwritten results from the days I was daydreaming or goofing off during college lectures, notes on roughly every member that was banned, deleted, or ejected from my e-federation, and personal notes on particular noteworthy and troublesome members. Here's a few samples:
Damian Wilson -- Suspended from Forums for Spamming and Advertising (2/13/07 to 2/27/07); Released on 4/2/07
user: "xcamelriderx" (X-Pac) -- Instantly released as he was a known pervert across several forums and e-federations.
Mr.Black asked for his release after I informed staff ahead of time that I was going to enforce stricter rules on the Freeroam RP boards and of course, without a place to cybersex on the forum, he was out of luck. That's why he asked for his release, making an in-character post that he was walking out with the e-federation's title. Dude, you weren't even a contender nor anywhere near main event at the time, so quit trying to make this into the Winter of Punk. Kudos to those who get the reference there. Anywho... after the holidays he came crawling back asking to return after leaving in a huff and deleting his account. Much like Sheena Marie and James Bowen before him, the answer was a hell no.
Now are you guys starting to see the pattern here? Don't forget it as it definitely does not end here.
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